It was Monday and I was headed to work at 6:45 in the morning like I do every week. This week was different though; I'd talked to Eve on the phone the night before and she sounded miserable. She is sick and nauseous from the pregnancy and was missing me terrible. I made it to the parking lot at work before I turned around. I decided that I wasn't going to stay in California and work until the end of April and that Eve needed my physical and emotional support more then she needed my financial support. I didn't go home right away though, I had a lot to think about and sat in the Wal-Mart parking lot for more then an hour. When I got home I called Eve to see what she thought about the decision. I wasn't sure what she was going to think when I told her. I'd hoped that she'd be relieved and happy but part of me worried that she'd think I was being reckless and irresponsible.

We had money saved but I lost most of it on bad investments speculating in the stock market. It is a scary prospect in this economy to quit a job in this economy without another job lined up. I started thinking that maybe I should just have Eve move back here and I'd keep my job and forget about going back to school. It's warmer here and we have family, job, friends, etc. But I remembered back to a priesthood blessing that Eve had me give her when we found out that we were pregnant again and remembered that the Lord told us that our next baby was suppose to be born in Utah. I remembered what my Patriarchal Blessing said about trying to get as much schooling as I can to support my family. In Utah in a couple of years after I got my degree I'd be able to get a better job and enable Eve to stay at home permanently with our kids. I had to move!

On my way back from Rancho I stopped by the storage unit and got some suitcases, money, and other stuff out. Part of me really wanted to just pack up and go the same night but then I though better of it because of all the things that were still unfinished. I called my boss at work and told him why I was missing in action. I told him that I'd be quiting and that my last day would be on Friday. He said that he understood why I was leaving and that he'd take care of the legistics for me. After I hung up I experience a little freak out. I dropped to my knees and prayed for help. There's been a lot of things lately that have had that effect on me.

The rest of the week I fasted for 2 meals a day and went to the temple at night. The first day I did Initiatory, the second an Endowment and Sealings, and the third I went with the ward and cleaned. There's so many things that are out of our control and the future is so uncertain that I decided the best thing I could do was turn over our lives to the Lord. I'm headed to Utah after I say goodbye to my family this weekend. I've been praying a lot and fervently; I'm more then a little bit scared and I'm sad to leave the place I've called home for the last 15 yrs. The Lord has given me a lot of peace. He's already answered by pray about a job and there's a position that just opened up in SLC with Franklin Bank that I should get. I applied online for the job and I feel really good about my prospects of getting it. If I do get the job then hopefully I'll be able to start soon and we won't even have a gap in our healthcare. The health care has been one of the scariest things with everyone in the family getting sick lately and will Eve being 11 weeks pregnant. The Lord is gracious!